When I realized we were coming up on the one year anniversary of the pandemic, I wanted to write a blog post about it, but I didn’t know what to say. There’s nothing to say that hasn’t already been said-that this has been the hardest year of our lives, that this is unprecedented, that we can only hope to get over this and move on with our lives. Then I thought maybe I shouldn’t write anything at all since there’s nothing new to say. But I wanted to mark this occasion. Although living through a pandemic for a year isn’t a happy moment in anyone’s life, it’s certainly an important one, and I like to work through things by writing. I want to be able to look back on this and remember not only the painful and difficult parts of the last year, but also the positive and happy moments.

Like everyone else in the world, I’ve lost and gained numerous things, but am so incredibly lucky to have gotten through relatively unharmed. I want to take time to mention that this post is by no means trying to make light of the pandemic, and is only my way of working through the complicated emotions this year has brought. So without further ado, the things I’ve lost and things I’ve gained since March 2020:

Things I’ve lost

• My grandma – Although I didn’t lose my grandma to COVID-19, this was an incredibly difficult loss because my family wasn’t able to be with her in the hospital, and it was 7 months before we were able to have any kind of memorial service for her (and even then it was outdoors, with masks, only immediate family).
• Desire to wear jeans – The ONLY time I wear jeans now is if I’m going outdoors where people are going to see me for an extended period of time. Otherwise, leggings are absolutely pants now.

Things I’ve gained

• Perspective – I absolutely took for granted what a wonderful and supportive family I have, but there is no way I would have gotten through this last year without them.
• Weight – For a while, the weight gain really bothered me. But I realized this is a literal once in a lifetime event that we’re going through, so I’m not going to punish or be angry at myself for losing motivation to exercise or limit snacks. Cookies always make a day better, and we’ve had a lot of bad days!